All in ONE day I've learned and realized

Today I have learned and realized:

My microwave can't cook popcorn correctly

El Cid  is the 2nd longest/boringest movie ever made

(the agony and the ecstasy takes first)

I am never motivated to do homework

I get distracted easily 

Running makes me feel good physically and mentally 

Today I didn't go, so now I don't feel good (simple as that).

500 days of Summer is wonder/annoying/satisfying.

Fool's Gold is kind of cute but dumb

I eat way to much during the day with out running 

I ROCK at words with Friends

Finding a car is still dumb

I hate silence most of the time

Waking up at 1 is not the best idea (it kind of makes the day go by really really fast)

you and someone can be having and feeling almost exactly the same and not even know it.

I have a bad habit of changing my hair color (see picture below)

My church is at 9. Last time I had church at 9 I wasn't on time ONCE

so with that said, I need to be on time tomorrow 

I am heading to bed

Reflecting

Today in my Eled class we talked about  Reflecting

We talked how we need to take "me time".

We need to sit and think back on our day, our thoughts, our actions and our feelings

My teacher talked about how good it feels to physically write things down 

to get out thought on paper. 

So my class did that today. 

This is what I wrote:

Lately I have been thinking a lot about the importance of reacting positively in situations that are out of our control. 

I just think about  myself and how I am usually pretty good at having an awesome attitude about every situation. I am always try to the best 

I find I have a better day when I choose to have a better attitude towards things. 

Some other people that I know, don't.

 I see them in their lives and see that they are unhappy more then they are happy.

I just think it is interesting how some people can be put in the same situation and so many of them have different thoughts and feelings towards the situation

I just think it is so important to find the sliver lining in the clouds. 

My biggest pet peeve is when I see people complain over things that really stupid. 

It always seems like some people are just so good at finding the negative in everything.

It just bugs.  

Anyways, those are my thoughts

they are kind of random and incomplete. 

but it works

Christ is real! He Lives! and meet ours needs

Today was weird. I am grateful for this day. I was blessed to feel the spirit so many times today. I gained a stronger testimony of Christ. He is so much aware of us. He really does know exactly what we need. I know I have been blessed to witness this in my life but today it was second hand that my testimony has grown. I came home yesterday and got to send some wonderful time with my family. Today I went to young womens and heard the most beautiful story. To summarize it quick. Son got cancer. 25% chance to live. Mom prayed knew her son was going to live. He did.
Once home from church my cousins and sierra came over for dinner. I had a nice chat with Sierra (read it, Follow it. She'll love it!) She told me a story that touched me so much. She had a tough time a while back. When she needed something to lift her up she received a letter in the mail. That letter was exactly what she needed to hear. Cheered her up. Made her day.
I just know that heavenly father really does loves us. He knows exactly what we need. When we need it and how we need it.
On a happy note...
I love my family! Today I got to spend time with them at good ol' stretch parties.  Just gotta love 'em!

this is me. This is Kim. or is it?

Since I started this blog just for me I feel like I need to be more honest. Make it more me. Sure all of the post have been fun stuff that I have enjoyed while here at college,but I have failed to mentions the parts that really make me stronger.
My life have been in an extreme uphill run for me. My emotions have just been thrown at me. I don't know what wrong with me. As much as I love college. I hate it. I miss how my life use to be. I feel like my friends are gone. The one that I want to keep my friend forever is slowing falling away. I know it is not good make assumptions about situations that I fully don't know. I just feel like every time I talk to her she doesn't want to talk to me. I just feel weird.
I sometimes hate who I am. I a shy, nervous and awkward girl. I wish I could be anyone I wanted myself be with out being frightened or flat out scared. I wish I was good at making friends. I wish peopled wanted to be my friends.I wish I had that personality that when I walk in a room the mood of the room shifts. I don't though. I walk into a room and sit in silence hoping someone will come and talk to me. I hear stories of people on campus who have so much fun with so many people. I don't I sit at home feeling sorry for myself.
 I am so grateful for being where I am. I need to be here. I don't want to be but I am here.
I know in life we can change they way we act and how we feel. For the most part I am good at keeping a great and happy attitude but after awhile it gets draining. I break down. I am breaking down now. I can't help it. I hate being weak. I hate feeling the way I am feeling. I hate the way I am acting. From this point on I am just going to be me.
I thought I knew who I was, but now I am starting to wonder. Who I am really? I am the person I want to be? I think I am. I have qualities that I wanted and I developed them and I was blessed with many. I just feel like I can be so much more. How do I do that? That I just don't know.
That is going to be a journey for me. Most likely a really long journey. I am lost... but somehow I will find myself again.
I don't remember what I wrote and I am not going to go back and read it. I just hope I have no regrets of what was just said. I don't think I will. I hope I will read back at a later date and see how I have grown.

Today I am missing tanner, so much. I cry for him. Today who have been his 1 yr mark, but instead it is his 4 month mark. In tanners letter this week he wrote: time goes by so fast! Can't believe Christmas is almost here, Christmas will be my 6 month mark! whats funny is tomorrow should be my year mark. Things don't always go according to plan or the way we think they should go, But i suppose it will always work out in the end.It always has so far in my past don't see how this would be any different. 
I miss him. I wish he was here. There a a few thing I want to do before he gets home.
1. Fill up the change jar for him.
2. Not get married. ( I want him at my wedding)
3. Write piano music for one of his songs.
4. Don't do anything that will make him disappointed in me.

Look at this! I miss this!

I wish he was here

I need one of his hugs

For right now there is nothing I can do. I know I am making this worst but dwelling on them, but sometimes I think it is perfectly fine.We all need a little sadness in our life. If we didn't we wouldn't fully love the happy times in our life. 

My best friend sent me this quote " God does notice us& he watches over us, but if is usually through another person that he meets our needs." Spencer W Kimball

I really believe this. I have seen it. Right I am praying for this. I need this.

unintended

I love college, BUT I hate it. I miss home. I am just so full of emotions right now. I just might break down and cry. I am stressed with a few tests coming up this week. I am stressed with math. I just want to be home. I miss my family. I miss my friends(the few that I have).

Something I am beginning to really realize a lot of things about myself. Some of them good some of them frustrate me. I seriously thought college was going to be a lot different then it is. I mean a lot of it is what I expect but a lot isn't.

I am really proud of myself. I am staying strong to what I believe. I'm not gonna lie.This may sound cheesy but When I first moved out I was thinking now I can wear what I want. I can wear my second earring and no one would really care. I haven't done any of that. I really thought I would, but I put that second earring or put on my dress that is a little short, I just can't leave my house. At first I wondered why. Now I know. When I would put those things on I would think what kind of boys would I attract if I wear this? Not the ones that I want to marry. This may sound even cheesier but I feel one of the reasons I am up here is to find someone to marry.(which is not going to be till my brother gets home). I want to attract the kind of men that I know I am going to marry.

Something I was not expecting is how you can not get a long with someone. You thought they were one way but the are totally different. I love my roommates. I really do. I am so grateful for them. I am so glad we all have the same beliefs and now what and who we stand for. I know that I am diffidently going to learn patience this year.

On the happy side of things. I just returned from the funnest dance EVER!! the paint dance!! So fun. Words can't even describe. I was soaked in paint. My hair was dripping. I was in the VERY front. Such I fun night. (Pictures to come later and more details).

So much better

Well today has been just grand! Huge step up from yesterday. I am feelin' good and lovin' the college life.
Even though it has been fun it has been painful. My feet are so sore right now and with my hurt feet I had to walk to church ( which ended up being the wrong church) and then walk back. I walked a girl back to Bullen. Then walked and ran back from Jones hall. The adventures today just kept getting better. This morning I woke up with my personal alarm clock Dani and made it to church on time! Thank goodness for her!
 
After church I got all my stuff cleaned and organized. well.... almost! And then the big grand adventure happened. The fire alarm went off.... oh yes. Dani finally figured out where our back door leads too. Good news we have a laundry place down those stairs.
I have met a lot of people today.5. all consisting of nice gentle men. I have learned a good lesson today. Make a Apps that people like and get paid!!! BIG Money!!! I am talking like 5-6 zeros on the end. Oh and the creator of angry birds so rich right now. He makes 1 millions just with ads a month!! That doesn't even include the cost of the app.

see ya!

Tanner left on Monday. I never thought he would leave (he was starting to drive my CRAZY!!!). I never thought he would come back in the first place. When a missionary leaves I don't think that the possibility of them coming home even crosses their minds. or even their friends and families minds. I remember the day Tanner came home. It was tough. I cried. I never thought he would. The thought never crossed my mind. When my family learned that tanner might have to come home I just prayed that he would get better. When he didn't I was disappointed. I wanted him so badly to stay. He so badly wanted to stay.  Now I am so grateful that he came home and got to spend 6 extra months with him. I got to get closer to him. I loved coming home on weekend nights and going up stairs to watch criminal minds with him and  to just talk. Now I come home and watch it by myself and think he is gone, but how grateful I am that he choose to go back out the mission field. I know when he got reassigned he was sad that he didn't get to go back to where he so patiently waited to go. From all of this I learned that heavenly father is so aware of  us and knows exactly what we need. He knows that other people need us. I truly believe that someone in Georgia needs my brother. He has the power to change their hearts. it is either that or his future wife awaits him there.  A lesson can be learned from any experiences we have in life. I learned a wonderful lesson from this experience and I will treasure it forever!

 Right before he left

best buds!!

I love Tanner and I am glad that he is gone he was starting to bug, I think he was just so ready! he was just waiting on the lord. My family has defiantly learned that god has his own times table.